Then I went to pick up my prescription. Jan 27, 2023 · However, while you’re providing your friends with a shoulder to lean on, you may also need someone to vent, cry, and complain to from time to time. When we see someone we know, the brain releases oxytocin, and this hormone is associated with feelings of love, trust, and attachment. Ask a question or start a conversation about (almost) anything you desire. Jul 2, 2018 · Talk about things that are painful or that you’re worried about, and wait for someone to give some kind of support, and see how interested they are — if they ask questions, express concern, if I’m an electrician. Award. It’s hard to grasp an idea or concept and talk about it for extended periods of time. yes, i completely agree about what you say about the anonymous element in telling problems to a stranger. It wasn’t that bad. For example, it often makes me laugh when someone knocks on my door to engage in religious proselytizing. But, you should be cautious. This is dangerous territory. Jul 7, 2021 · When Boateng offers advice to patients who talk nonstop about their medical condition, seemingly to the exclusion of anything else, she recommends that they "set a limit per day, whether it is ten Talking to strangers about your issues is a lot easier than talking to friends. # 7. I have an assumption that people simply don't want to be bothered by other strangers because there's so many crazy people in the city. I’m a safe person to talk to, I guess. S. People in your circle may be very similar to you, and offer no advice that you haven't already considered. Chromophobia: Fear of colours. May 28, 2023 · People Can Dislike You Because of Their Phobias (Fears) The following phobias are just a few of the 500 + phobias related to why someone could fear you (not hate you). Many people find it difficult to talk about their feelings and emotions. '. In fact, it comes more from another behavior often observed on Germans: They are said to be very direct and trying to be effective in what they are doing - that's why most of them Jul 15, 2014 · In a nutshell: Advice giving usually doesn't work, and often completely backfires. an appointment. I saw them out to the baggage claim. It probably is just cos they think you look nice. Jan 26, 2009 · The only time people ever try to tell me their problems are when they're people like me, who just like to talk and don't care who they talk to. You want quality time with them. May 28, 2009 · 28 May 09. It’s almost like my thoughts are very jumbled and disorganized. k. It comes down to you setting boundaries around it so that when someone tries, you can politely excuse yourself from the situation, such as, I am sorry but I'm pressed for time and. At first I just said “Hey, don’t know you. as much as she is making your life difficult, i do not believe it is necessary to ‘get rid of her’. I Oct 15, 2021 · Talking about a problem requires you to arrange your thoughts in an order that someone else can easily understand. a. giving you a back door approach - no pun intended) Mar 6, 2022 · Studies show that our brains process emotions differently regarding strangers and loved ones. [deleted] Paranoia, Delusions and Hallucinations. The body’s natural response is to conserve energy and prioritize rest, causing you to feel sleepy during Apr 8, 2024 · Yet the researchers instructed some of the commuters to do just that: chat up a stranger during a ride. Mainly because nothing really interests me anymore. Seniors may make false accusations of theft or abuse, see people and things that aren’t there, or believe someone is trying to harm them. Friends often assume they can help you by offering a solution, even if you didn't ask for one. Mar 17, 2017 · Finally, toward the end of the book, she complains that random strangers tend to approach her in public with their "petty problems" and she wishes she could tell them to "shut up. Though it may be uncomfortable, saying no, especially when you feel overwhelmed, is a healthy way to set boundaries in your friendship. It happened again and again, and I eventually just reply Jan 11, 2023 · Understanding why others come to us for help lies at the core of human interaction and the connections we form. A group of eight New Yorkers recently met up for the first time to tell each other personal stories from their pasts. If you are with them in person, you could try moving to Partly it's because I make eye contact. There are those that give off a vibe that they are open and available so others feel safe to dump their stuff on them. If you each take a time out, do so for at least 20 minutes, during which time you should try not to replay the incident in your mind. Why Do Strangers, Tell Me Their Problems. These behaviors can be especially difficult for caregivers to witness and try to remedy. But I'm not the most sympathetic person in the world, so their problems usually fall on deaf ears with me. Oct 19, 2016 · And that does include gathering stories from men, as well as stories from outside the United States. Do not engage or argue. There have been countless times, when I’m working on someone’s house, when complete strangers will tell me their life story, their family problems, etc. The simple act of opening the door goes such a long way. It could be many reasons but its probably just they think you look good and don't mean to stare. May 6, 2022 · Watch. May 28, 2022 · It can be difficult if you’re the person people always come to with their problems. hey sasha, please do not resort to violence to get rid of your friend. Alliumphobia: Fear of anything relating to garlic. Reply reply. Uncategorized. Set a time limit, and respect their need to disconnect if it becomes too much for them emotionally. They get bored easily and have a constant need for attention. Don’t give a predictable reply. Have a fun conversation about anything that is on your mind. have a good day. Some links might steal your information, or install malware that gives scammers access to your device. I do not, have never, and never will care about anyone’s problems but my own, and those of my immediate family. 1. Basically, hear them out for a while and give advice if that's what they want. •. Here are the 12 reasons why being sensitive can draw others to you. All I know is they must somehow know I have a soft heart and I’m willing to listen. Delete and report them using your phone’s “report junk” option or forwarding unwanted texts to 7726 (SPAM) and unwanted emails to your email provider. Blue Heeler quirks can include being wary of strangers, herding the children, digging in the water dish, and having excessively mouthy behaviors. You may be confused about why so many people – both friends and strangers alike – come to you with all of their issues. This phenomenon is often linked to reduced blood flow to the brain, leading to drowsiness. Growing up, I would see people come up to my Mom and talk to her. I do have to keep boundaries close if I need them. They are subconsciously saying 'I want our relationship to be meaningful. I don't know this for sure, but I personally believe it's because it's significantly less likely for a complete stranger to have any interest in screwing you over. You don't have to put in a lot of efforts sometimes but just being there for someone and validating their feelings is meaningful enough. Remain polite, but detached. ”. I just got their first names. " Maybe to make me feel better or something I dunno. Just because I'm xxx or like xxx doesn't mean I asked you to talk shit about me, especially when you are a stranger on the internet or irl and I really don't care what you have to say. Empathic illnesses are those in which you manifest symptoms that are not your own. I usually can never tell my friends or anyone close to me about my issues or whatever’s going on in my life. 12/01/2011 at 2:44 am. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. 29 May 09. communication is key. Under certain circumstances—seated on a plane nearly touching shoulders, being Many people follow me and interact as much as possible with me and even ask me to hang out without ever having a long conversation with me besides small talk, I’ve had people even tell about me to their friends and then said friends would follow me and try to go out with me as well. You mention that sometimes you feel “used” by your friends. Opportunities to make new friends are all around us. I personally recommend being a little more open to talking to people. Bingo. Paranoia and hallucinations in the elderly can take many forms. Describing Apr 19, 2024 · It’s frustrating to socialize with you because everything has to be on your terms, which is why people don’t like you very much. Sep 28, 2017 · Small thinks this underappreciated fact might tell us something important about human nature and the kinds of connections we need to combat loneliness. May 6, 2022. I’ve had some pretty amazing conversations and met some cool people just going about my day. You simply ask him how he’s doing, and 15 minutes later, he is still answering your question, not only venting but actually dumping his pain, frustration, and struggles on you. " (This is the idea underlying the title of the book. Jan 18, 2016 · Men of a certain type, the ones who can't deal with the fact that women might have actual feelings that don't have anything to do with them. If I’m ever talking to someone I’ve only met like Oct 27, 2018 · When someone’s gaze is directed at you, then your tendency will be to stare back in a “nonverbal acknowledgment. Rocketj1. Time. I don't want to cause a scene. We miss neurotypical social cues and rules because they don’t make sense to us. My biggest fear is probably being perceived as a crazy person or an asshole who doesn't respect the personal space of others. In fact I started to get a reputation for giving good advice, which just blew my mind. Sometimes a stranger offers unsolicited advice as a way to start a conversation. It is a lack of understanding of neurotypical social situations. Mar 13, 2024 · 2) They think you are overly needy or clingy. "People’s true pool of confidants is Nov 20, 2023 · Stay calm when confronted with rage. "That's why my show is popular. These people need to develop a sense of agency. If they just want to vent, let them do it for a while (how ever long you want) and then try to move the conversation in a better direction. 7. Jan 3, 2019 · Here’s how to deal with someone who makes fun of you: 1. 2. Immediately after getting in line, the lady in front of me turned around to tell me the cost of her prescriptions, that she needed a pulse oximeter, and that she had open heart surgery 2 weeks ago. Androphobiais: Fear of adult men. I never understood it either. 1 person likes this. How you doing?” with a big ass smile on their faces. . May 3, 2018 · The friend who is all about making it better and, out of her own discomfort, refuses to acknowledge that you can actually make terrible choices (“You’re exaggerating. @rocketj1 (6955) All. Help them focus on their feelings by saying things A random person sat next to me at a friend's wedding told me all about his issues with depression, someone I just met told me about issues with his ex girlfriend, and an ex colleague told me all about issues in his marriage out of nowhere. One of the main reasons why people make fun of others is because they feel small. Men see this as an even bigger obstacle because society tells us to dismiss their feelings, which is wrong and harmful. But there’s a fine line between sharing and being self-centered. Without people breaking the barriers of social awkwardness to talk to strangers, no one would have a story to tell. To the commuters’ surprise, the task was easy and pleasant. Feb 23, 2022 · Admittedly, sometimes people choose to cheat because they’re in a bad relationship and want out. It made me a halfway decent publicist for a time, but just because I can interact with strangers doesn’t mean I always enjoy it, or even want to. Some chat rooms may involve typing while others use video calls to connect you with strangers. Yesterday, I went to pick up my new glasses and learned everything I didn't care to know about the lab tech. May 4, 2021 · Instead, the review is seen mainly by strangers. Sadly, even once vibrant marriages and relationships can devolve into Dec 13, 2023 · Feeling sleepy when talking to someone can be due to a combination of factors, including increased relaxation and decreased brain activity. And then she went straight to "something seems to be troubling you". You tell others what they should do. Take a few deep breaths to avoid escalating the conflict. Altho I love helping people as it does take my mind off my own problems most of the time. I feel like I can come to you with my problems and I hope you know I will return the favour. Sometimes they feel stuck because of kids, finances, social mores, or whatever. Men, who tell you to "cheer up" because of course as a woman you are supposed to be estatically pleased a man has deigned to give you their attention. So they sneak Apr 22, 2024 · 10. :) Feb 2, 2015 · She rationalizes her behaviors as being necessary because of defects in her daughter’s character or behavior. Post navigation. Strangers also ask me for random technology or mechanical advice. But there is a fine line between helping someone and keeping yourself mentally healthy. The more we talk to strangers, the Jun 18, 2024 · 3. Or a friend gives advice to forge a connection . (“Girl, please! That’s nothing. 4. jenna August 18th, 2023 . Reacting angrily or defensively will likely only make the situation worse. Strangers always come up to us and strike up conversation. You’re Not Likely to Talk About Yourself By presenting them with just the information relating to the issue, without a heap of context that all of your friends would have and consider, you can get less biased answers. Jan 12, 2011 · Anonymous. When I'd ask afterwards who they were, she would say, "Oh, I don't know who that is. Archived post. I try to know everything, so when I see them struggling with their camera or trying to start a car I probably look at them with an expression which says, "I know the answer to your problem". Lots of common ground. When you rise to the bully’s bait, they will feel encouraged to keep on having fun at your expense. Alex Calder, a female reader in Dublin, posted our Notes discussion on Facebook and asked her Mar 17, 2024 · It takes at least 20 minutes for the nervous system to regulate and calm down and for chemical levels associated with anger to return to normal levels. !!! I cannot tell you all the traumatic situations people have opened up to me literally just after learning their name. When we see a stranger or someone who poses a threat to us, the brain releases adrenaline associated with fear or anger. Past trauma or socialization issues may not be the reasons for your cat’s behavior. Strangers may, of course, contradict the negative review – although there is generally minimal ongoing discussion. This happens a lot with friends and family sometimes they are asking for advice but mostly just telling me things. So they forget the non-talking period when they first met me. Yes, all the time. You have an opinion on everyone else’s life, and they don’t have a choice whether they want to hear it. It gets a lot harder as you grow older, and the differences and distances between people grow wider, where it's harder to fathom and empathize with all the different life experiences, and listening by itself isn't enough. Apr 21, 2023 · Alternatively, if they start getting condescending and implying that you’re either too young, too inexperienced, or not bright enough to do it yourself—and as such should listen to advice from someone more experienced—you can shut that down real quick. It’s sort of messed up. Try taking a walk if possible. It's a gift and a curse. Anthropophobia: Fear of people. Mainly residential. These unknown parts of your psyche can represent hidden talents, desires, fears, or unresolved issues that are waiting to be discovered or addressed. tell her to her face that she is being manipulative, and if she does not like that, who cares? she obviously doesn’t like you, either, and she is keeping you around most In my experience, both men and women ask for directions, randomly chat and sometimes try to flirt. The. When they behave like that they are explicitly looking for an emotional (or even physical) response from you. Share. When my husband gets home from work it's pointless to try and have a conversation because our kids wanna play with him. People have busy lives but I just feel like friendship is a two-way street. When someone directs their anger and rage at you, it’s important to stay calm. "For example, if there happens to be someone from the military in these networks, they might be able to start to pick up information from their profile For me, I’ve noticed that it’s very difficult for me to hold conversations with people as time goes on. “I was out on the street, selling drugs, at quite a young age,” said one young woman, fighting back tears. “In 2012, I got shot in a robbery and I was paralyzed. " And I guess that's where my own story ends — with me telling you about a time someone else told me their story. Unreliable. May 13, 2021 · Empaths have a tendency to take on the problems of others as their own. So, if you get the impression that Germans are not willing to talk to you, it isn't a result of their grumpy mood. fineartist. This is the best explanation I've read, thank you! Reply reply. I’d reply with something like “Like I said, don’t know you” and walk away. I do know twats like that. People usually have a fair share of personal problems they are handling and are not very open about it, so when you tell them your thoughts and burdens, they have a tendency to "escape" by not talking to you, because it reminds them of their own weight. ) But when you're an advice columnist, that's going to happen. You can look up conversation starters and ask strangers related questions, and you can stop talking whenever you wish. Three: They're different. ”) The friend who confuses connection with the opportunity to one-up you. May 27, 2015 · Here are 3 surprising psychological reasons why: Source: CandyBox Images/Shutterstock. This is a lot easier to achieve there. May 9, 2023 · Key points. I'd tell my close family and friends but usually it seems like there is never time. January 23, 2023 Michael. I don’t know why but I always feel embarrassed or weirded out that they’d have that information. 6. That means we want you to show I talk to those I know and feel comfortable with. Environmental Stress. I was thinking about this morning as quite a lot of people seem to tell me a lot of information about their lives even when I havent asked or I've asked a seemingly innocent question. False Intimacy Triggers. 2 people like this. 2) If you want to go out to a bar and pick up, having a girl with you immediately signals to other girls present that you aren't just another sleazy guy hanging with his bros and hungry for sex. Jokes might help, but they might be hard to pull of in that situation. I had a shockingly similar experience a while ago! I was just trying to get a ceramics project done when a girl I'd never even met started going on about her dad overdosing, her mom being abusive, her boyfriend breaking up with her and on and on. (a. You know how it goes: you meet a stranger at a party, and 10 seconds after the conversation starts, she's deep into a very personal and very detailed Jan 10, 2016 · Being a sensitive person and having the ability to recognize how others are feeling, is a very useful trait to have. You are forced to think about the problem from an outside perspective. But when I do come to them with my own problem, they're not there for me. And it's because I had to teach myself how to "pass" - and that means that I do a lot more active listening than the average NT, I Autism is not a lack of ability to understand social situations. Looking at someone who looks at you, therefore, becomes a key aspect of Aug 7, 2023 · 4. People sometimes approach me and other times approach different people. Self-centredness. In less than four minutes, we can delve into the intricate psychological and sociological dynamics that create the phenomenon of individuals seeking solace, advice, and assistance from specific people. Dec 13, 2023 · If you’re going through a crisis, you can call 988 in the U. Guys don’t have to tell me to smile, because I do it anyway. Never click links in an unexpected message. I always end up being awkward at parties (when I finally go - I usually don't want to). These people like you, they are offering you a secret to show you, you can trust them too. Make sure they know it’s not bad news. The vast majority of people love interactions which are voluntary and which they don’t feel obligated into by custom or social convention. Research suggests that strangers are more open to talking to us than we predict they will be. Tell me if this sounds familiar: You are at a social event, and you start a conversation with a stranger or even a person you know well. Someone else—possibly an abusive parent or older sibling—has put them in a position where they feel powerless, and they don’t have a healthy means of dealing with it. For years I wondered why the hell people would come to ME (of all people!) with their problems. We find people underestimate how positive people will feel when they express gratitude to them, or say thanks. I dont get it. " Jun 27, 2017 · "There are people that are just social," Schultz says. This is, in many ways, the hardest Aug 9, 2023 · Seeing strangers in your dreams may symbolize aspects of yourself that you are not fully aware of or have yet to explore. This type of advice is well-meaning and can often be helpful at times. Oct 4, 2020 · Why is it so easy to talk about your deepest feelings, problems, concerns, dreams with a complete stranger? Because the stranger does not judge you. It’s funny to see their reaction. and your call will be routed to a local-ish crisis center. What’s more, their moods lifted. I must run to. Apr 19, 2024 · The avoidant person doesn’t do well with having serious questions sprung on them unexpectedly. “I know more than you. Sure, it’s nice to be needed and feel helpful, but it can be emotionally draining. Whenever I have difficulty, they just don't understand and don't believe I'm an introvert. Nov 23, 2015 · Information systems professor Grandon Gill says that there may be no precise answer to why strangers are sending you friend requests. Maybe you'll make some friends in the process. Jul 6, 2017 · A safety precaution to keep from offending or upsetting anyone who might, in turn, make things ugly. This is echoed a lot in this thread but men and women talk about problems with a different end goal for the conversation. Sep 22, 2011 · So why tell me all of your personal problems? What am i supposed to do with them? And a few other people do this with me too, they tell me about their boyfriend/girlfriend problems, about their health issues etc, about their family issues, and trust me we are not even acquaintances. If you respond to the bully in a predictable way, you are implying that they have said something funny, even though they haven’t. May 30, 2015 · For Most Germans, Small Talk is a Waste of Time. 1) Help you pick out a wardrobe that will attract other girls. Another of the top reasons people ignore you is when you are overly needy or clingy. May 20, 2021 · Why people overshare, according to science. I guess that was the key, and the next 2 and a half hours were spent with me bawling and telling her my life story till we landed. [ez-toc] 1. They are not ready for you to “switch to their side” so, at that moment, you can have a lot of fun, while they’re still processing what the hell is going on. Additionally, it is common for empaths to feel drained after spending time around people. This happens to me too. If conversations with you tend to be one-sided, always about you and your life, people may start avoiding you. Watch. I had deep red lipstick on today and people seemed to be staring at that, for whatever reason. I look familiar to everybody and I don't know why. It’s natural to want to talk about ourselves and our experiences. Sep 1, 2022 · What parents can do: If we know that you'll embrace our individuality regardless of what you hoped for us, we'll know we can continue to share ourselves with you. It is often difficult for them to set boundaries for themselves and say no, even when too much is being asked of them. I had one lady at the last place I worked at spend almost an hour opening up to me and every so often would say, "I don't know why I'm telling you this, I never tell people this. Some of these behaviors can be easily explained and traced back to the heritage of your dog’s ancestors. Literally almost every stranger I've ever talked to says I look really familiar. They will tell us all their innermost secrets etc. Because I fucking hate that shit, and for some reason apparently I come off as a person who wants to hear peoples problems, because they tell me CONSTANTLY. Tz00_Lee_Tronic. They feel powerless, so they try to take power from others. If you recently moved into a new house, your cat may take several days or weeks to Oct 7, 2019 · Nicholas Epley: Not only do we find that people aren't social enough in connecting with strangers, we find that people aren't social enough in lots of ways for their own well-being. ”, and they’d reply with things like “What are you doing here?” with that giant grin of theirs. Many patients have come to me labeled “agoraphobic” with panic disorders, chronic depression, fatigue, pain, or mysterious ailments that respond only partially to medications or psychotherapy. And because they are distant enough to see the Oct 28, 2014 · Oct 28, 2014 at 06:36 PM. You validate the feelings of others. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. @fineartist (1217) • United States. Oct 19, 2013 · They’ll only continue to dump on you, getting temporary relief by venting but staying stuck. Keep holding your head up! 9. My old friends used to joke how people would always randomly tell me about their problems. Aug 21, 2023 · Friendliness. I have to specify it’s 90% women and very rarely men. Set aside a time of their choosing to talk. Some were nearly housebound or ill for years. Interestingly, again going back to the original Bearden & Oliver article, people may feel satisfied once they got their point “out there” – and “walk away” from the issue. Reply. Oct 18, 2023 · Why Do Strangers, Tell Me Their Problems. Therefore, there's no reason you wouldn't confide in them, as humans are naturally social and want to talk about these things anw, they just don't trust the people around them. May 23, 2024 · When you meet strangers online, you can start chatting right away and freely talk within the rules of the chat room. People call the crisis line for all kinds of reasons: the electricity is about to get turned off, they don’t have food, or they’re trying to get out of a domestic violence situation. 11. And these are random strangers, mind you. Under certain circumstances—seated on a plane nearly touching shoulders, being Jun 3, 2024 · It could lead to a scam. tc xm vr lz ez to ln bj kr kp